sugar_geisha (sugar_geisha) wrote,

It's Been A Long Time

I know I haven't updated in a long time, think of it as a caterpillar going through its transformation. I have been in my cocoon, changing, becoming, recovering. I'm not "there" yet but I have emerged, I am sitting in the sun drying my wings. Waiting for the right time to lift off and fly.

I have been in recovery, off my own back, for about 6 months now. I have gained some and am now up to roughly 112 lbs. I have only been weighing myself once a month and am eating every day - what a novelty huh?? I decided it was the right time, I know it is the right time for me to be going through this. It's hard, so so hard. I struggle every day to get through and keep up with this but I'm still here and still doing it 6 months on. I see the light at the end of the tunnel that I really could lead a "normal" (whatever that is!) life. I have a job, I work hard and love it. I work in a petshop where my boss is my (IRL) best friend. I work with her two sons (one of which I am head over heels with!) and get to work with animals all day. It's very theraputic.

I hope I can make it, make it when I know so many have failed or not even had the chance. I know I can be free of this. I am changed, I am a new person. I have a new life ahead of me. I just need to work. I feel happy, I don't mind my lumps and bumps so much. I get complimented more, guys notice me (and my now giant bewbs!). I feel like a woman.

I hope you guys are all well. This week would have been Jello's (industrikitty) birthday. I dedicate this entry to her and to how much I still miss her, how much I still feel the pain of losing her just as so many others do.

<3 R.I.P. Misty <3
I Love You
Tags: an, butterfly, ed, free, industrikitty, jello, misty, new life, recovery
  • Post a new comment


    default userpic
Hi Eve, this post really moved me. I'm so happy to read how far you've come. I'm so glad you made the decision to recover, you deserve to be well, you're such a beautiful person! I still miss Jello too *hugs*. She'd be so very proud of you <333 Lots of love xx
It's wonderful to see you're doing so well these days Eve - I would love to work in a pet shop but I'd always be very sad to see the animals go ... I get waaaay too attached to things! You've always been a gorgeous person inside and out, I'm glad that you're starting to see & feel it too.

R xo


May 25 2008, 14:03:21 UTC 8 years ago

This is realy random, I know. I stumbled across your lj long ago and read it all the time. I stopped reading for a number of reasons, also long ago. You popped into my head while I was reading another lj today. It's really great to hear you've been getting better, and I hope you still are. Best of luck with everything!