sugar_geisha (sugar_geisha) wrote,
sugar_geisha
sugar_geisha

It's Been A Long Time

I know I haven't updated in a long time, think of it as a caterpillar going through its transformation. I have been in my cocoon, changing, becoming, recovering. I'm not "there" yet but I have emerged, I am sitting in the sun drying my wings. Waiting for the right time to lift off and fly.

I have been in recovery, off my own back, for about 6 months now. I have gained some and am now up to roughly 112 lbs. I have only been weighing myself once a month and am eating every day - what a novelty huh?? I decided it was the right time, I know it is the right time for me to be going through this. It's hard, so so hard. I struggle every day to get through and keep up with this but I'm still here and still doing it 6 months on. I see the light at the end of the tunnel that I really could lead a "normal" (whatever that is!) life. I have a job, I work hard and love it. I work in a petshop where my boss is my (IRL) best friend. I work with her two sons (one of which I am head over heels with!) and get to work with animals all day. It's very theraputic.

I hope I can make it, make it when I know so many have failed or not even had the chance. I know I can be free of this. I am changed, I am a new person. I have a new life ahead of me. I just need to work. I feel happy, I don't mind my lumps and bumps so much. I get complimented more, guys notice me (and my now giant bewbs!). I feel like a woman.

I hope you guys are all well. This week would have been Jello's (industrikitty) birthday. I dedicate this entry to her and to how much I still miss her, how much I still feel the pain of losing her just as so many others do.

<3 R.I.P. Misty <3
I Love You
Tags: an, butterfly, ed, free, industrikitty, jello, misty, new life, recovery
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Hi Eve, this post really moved me. I'm so happy to read how far you've come. I'm so glad you made the decision to recover, you deserve to be well, you're such a beautiful person! I still miss Jello too *hugs*. She'd be so very proud of you <333 Lots of love xx
It's wonderful to see you're doing so well these days Eve - I would love to work in a pet shop but I'd always be very sad to see the animals go ... I get waaaay too attached to things! You've always been a gorgeous person inside and out, I'm glad that you're starting to see & feel it too.

R xo

Anonymous

May 25 2008, 14:03:21 UTC 8 years ago

This is realy random, I know. I stumbled across your lj long ago and read it all the time. I stopped reading for a number of reasons, also long ago. You popped into my head while I was reading another lj today. It's really great to hear you've been getting better, and I hope you still are. Best of luck with everything!